Episode 53: Create Your Amazing Self

Good morning everyone, and welcome to Sparkle School, where together, we access our innate, iNtuitive wisdom as unique, self-valuing, and deeply Feeling women … and share who we are becoming in a safe, sensitive community.

In recent weeks, we’ve been learning about ‘creative tension,’ and how it shows up in the creative projects we take on. Today we peek at the possibility of using ‘creative tension’ to help us fully actualize OURSELVES. As iNtuitive-Feeling types, we are part of a small, invisible minority of women who are naturally, continuously, and robustly self-actualizers. That means that from a very early age, there are parts of us actively working on ourselves as creative projects. We can think of this as happening in a kind of dance between three subtle parts of who we are; our logical, conscious mind, our emotionally charged subconscious, and our mysterious super-conscious … or creative, high self. When I think of these elements in my body, I think of the logical mind at the 6th chakra, in the center of my forehead. The emotionally charged subconscious I place in my heart, or in my stomach, where I feel it most. And the super-conscious, I visualize hovering about 6 inches above my head.

One of our wisest community members recently said, “I was expecting creative tension to be light, and fun, and playful, but it isn’t is it? It’s hard, and challenging and not fun at all!” This was such a great comment on creativity in general, because the little kid in us wants to equate creativity with the feelings we had as children, when we had hours of time for coloring with crayons, or playing with toys. It is shocking to us, as adults, to experience times when we have a creative, self-actualization in mind, but our process gets muddied up with self-doubts and fears. We long for those childhood days, before we learned to question our every choice, and judge our every creation, in response to input we received from the Sensing-majority culture in which we live. The good news, is that as mature, iNtuitive-Feeling adults, we can convert the negative energy of our self-doubts, so that instead of stealing our dreams, it helps us to achieve them.

Last week, we saw how, when we are creating some project, ‘creative tension’ often shows up as emotional disruptions; negative feelings that we might call ‘stage fright’, or ‘writer’s block,’ or ‘white canvas syndrome.’ We can just feel the ‘tension’ in these moments of self-doubt, and feel defeated by them. So, it helps to remember that their impact upon us is likely to be equal in magnitude, to whatever positive, exciting motivation has us creatively involved in the first place. We can think of these positive and negative emotions as the plus and minus poles of the internal battery that gives us the energy to break through our doubts and fears, and create something wonderful.

This exact same thing happens in our process of creating ourselves as fully actualized beings. We are born with a positive pull to improve ourselves, on a soul level, but we are essentially asking ourselves to do this in a judgmental, Sensing-majority environment that presents enormous roadblocks to our progress.